I'm Glad You Were Born WINNERS!

We had some amazing entries in our "I'm Glad You Were Born" contest. There we so many inspirational, moving and loving stories share with us, we hope you had time to read a few and be inspired about the blessings that children bring into our lives and our world.

Here at Cotton Babies, we really enjoy getting the opportunity to learn a bit more about the people we serve every day. It was a pleasure to read what you shared about you, your family, your hopes and your dreams. One of the core values of Cotton Babies is that we want every mom (or dad, grandparent, etc.) to leave our stores feeling that they are a "good mom". We are here to assist you on your parenting journey, so we appreciate these little moments and feel so privileged you gave us a special glimpse into your world.

It was a very difficult task to choose the top three responses. As we read your responses, you made us smile, laugh and cry (especially the expecting mother on the judging panel, she cried a LOT!) So without further ado, here is the $100 Cotton Babies gift certificate grand prize winner:

Chris said...
I’m so glad you were born because the world needs more women like you. You’re a fearless leader. You forgive quickly. You are not afraid of heights, bees, or snakes. Where there is music, you will dance and sing. Wearing your bathing suit is cause for celebration. You understand that a loved one’s kiss can heal wounds. You’re not afraid to be the loudest one at the party. You hug your friends when they cry, and join them when they laugh. You can, and often do, laugh at yourself. You think broad daylight and nudity mix well. You get up quickly after falling. You are not afraid to try again if you fail the first time. Your deep belly laugh makes a smile appear on the grumpiest of faces. You like broccoli. You eradicated all fears I had about what kind of mom I would be.
In the 19 months your soft, round, warm little body has graced my world, you’ve allowed me to be the woman I had spent 32 years trying to become. That such a petite little girl can so fundamentally change my worldview leaves me with no doubts that your mark on this world will extend beyond me and your dad and the dog and cat you love to chase. I’ll always be proud to be your mommy, pumpkin. Now go get ‘em, girl.

Our second place prize, a $50 Cotton Babies gift certificate, goes to Jenica who wrote:

"When did you become so patient?" my step-mom said to me just the other day. I was dealing with a very stubborn two-year old while attempting to negotiate with my four year old and soothe my 7 week old. When did I become so patient? Had you asked me four plus years ago what my good qualities were, patience would not have been on the list. In fact, I was known for saying "Patience is not my forte."

There are many reasons I'm glad that my three kids were born, but one of the big ones is all the things THEY have taught ME! Sure, I've taught them many things, but they teach me more every day.

*They teach me patience when they act up; I have learned to stay calm through it all.
*They teach me forgiveness when they hug me and tell me they love me five minutes later.
*They teach me to be humble when they tell me I'm the most beautiful mommy.
*They teach me humility when they share their bodily fluids with me (haha!!).
*They teach me selflessness when I help them with what they need first when what I really need to do is run to the bathroom!

And most importantly, they have taught me that love knows no bounds, that it can grow infinitely. I never thought I could love my husband more, but seeing him as a daddy has increased that love. I never thought I could love another child as much as I love my first, but my love has grown three times. And for this, I'm so glad all of you were born - Taryn, Alaina & Elizabeth.

Third place, winner of a $25 Cotton Babies gift certificate, goes to Sara who wrote...

Darling Penelope,

When I try to recall life before you entered my world, the details are fuzzy. I feel as though everything leading up to your birth was meant to prepare me for the miracle that awaited me, and even though you’ve only been here for a few short months, you’ve already taught me more than I have learned in all my previous years. You’ve taught me more than patience, selflessness and gentleness… you’ve taught me to live life in the moment. Phone calls, dishes and laundry will wait very patiently, and, desperate as I am for a shower, the most important thing I can do right now is watch your chest softly rise and fall as you drift off to sleep. That’s why my first Mother’s Day as a mom brings me to this realization: Mother’s Day isn’t so much about celebrating mothers as it is about celebrating the children that make us mothers; each one unique, each one a precious gift. I am so thankful for this moment—this brief pause—that I can spend in quiet wonder, thanking God for you.

We also found an "honorable mention" that moved us as well, so Amy will also receive a $10 Cotton Babies gift card:

You frustrate me. You make me feel inadequate, confused and lonely. You demand much and give so little. Because of you, I will never have another moment where I am not thinking about someone other than myself. And that, my dear girl, is why I am so glad you were born. You prevent my selfishness and demand my best. You do not give in wealth or fame, but what you do give is fundamental and refreshing. For the hours of incessant cries comes a burst of delightful giggles. You give in affection, satisfaction and allegiance. Each inch you grow and skill you master bear out the fact that the privilege of guiding you through life is mine. You remind me that my inadequacies are conquerable and my loneliness is unnecessary. You are the jewel of my crown, my joy, the answer to my question. I am a mother, and you are my child forever. And that, my angel, is why I am so glad you were born.

Since we had more than 250 entries, we're giving away 6 randomly drawn winners who will also each receive a $10 Cotton Babies gift card. Those winners are:

• DesignerJules
• Lisa B.
• SarcasticRedhead
• SamSanow
• MomLovesDeals
• Amanda J.

All winners will receive an e-mail from Cotton Babies with their gift code no later than 5 p.m. Central time on Monday, May 23, 2011. Thank you to all who participated and remember to watch this blog for our Tuesday blog giveaways!

Real Mom Talk: Turn That Frown Upside Down

For today's installment of Real Mom Talk, we're trying something new. Today will be the voices of real moms, sharing their tips and experience.

We've all had rough, difficult or just plain bad days. It seems that once you add another life into the mix, the chances of things not going as planned seem to multiply exponentially. So what do you do when you recognize things aren't going so well and how do you change it?

Yesterday, we asked our Facebook fans:

Did your mother ever tell you "Turn that frown upside down"? How do you turn around a rough or difficult day? What do you do to change and improve your mood? Share your tips with us!

We received a lot of great responses and want to share with you what real moms suggest.

Jessica W. of WY said: “I like to blast my favorite music. Exercising helps a lot too. After a good sweat, it's almost like 'what was I mad about?'”

Adriel M. of AL said, “A cup of something warm: tea, coffee, cocoa, and five minutes of just sitting quietly, telling myself it is not as bad as I think. I just find something soothing in holding a steaming mug. Oh, and an uninterrupted shower is always good too.”

Memphis Misfit Mama said, "Get my baby to laugh!"

Ruthie V. of WI said, "I listen to Paul Simon's "You Can Call Me Al" really, really loud and dance around.... never fails to revise my mood."

What do you do when you see you or your children in need of an attitude adjustment? How do you turn the mood in your household around? Share your tips and tricks with us in the comments below.

You're One Good Mum and bumGenius Giveaway

While we comb (and cry) our way through the entries for our "I'm Glad You Were Born" giveaway, it's become quite clear our Cotton Babies community is filled with great parents and caregivers. While we are busy trying to select the best of the best of those entries, we'd like to share a little giveaway fun with you.

For today's blog giveaway, three random winners will each receive a Cotton Babies "You're One Good Mum!" t-shirt and a bumGenius 4.0 cloth diaper. We hope that each time you wear this and look in the mirror you are reminded what a great mom you are.

I love the message of these shirts so much I bought one for my mother and each of my sisters, who are also mothers. It's my hope that they never forget they are a good mom, even on the toughest of days.

To enter today's blog giveaway for your chance to win one of our prize packs, leave a comment on this blog post sharing what you think makes you "one good mum" or dad. Go ahead, brag on yourself! Are you a great cook, energetic storyteller, the best boo-boo kisser ever? Share with us what makes you a great parent.

Eligible entries must be posted today, Tuesday, May 17, 2011. U.S. Residents only. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary to win. Winners will be drawn at random on Wednesday, May 18, 2011 and notified via e-mail. (Please make sure Cotton Babies staff can see your e-mail in your comment or through your Blogger profile page, please.)

Real Mom Talk: I'm glad you were born

To my princess,

I'm glad you were born. I'll admit "glad" was not the word that came to my mind the day I sat staring at those two lines as the sounds of three little boys under 18 months of age bombarded me through the bathroom door. Terrified, shocked, worn, nervous... all of these things, but not exactly glad, at least not in those early minutes. Those same emotions flooded me again the day we saw you on the ultrasound and heard you were a girl. I recall thinking, "But I KNOW how to raise boys! I'm not ready for this new challenge!"

Princess, you've taught me how to be a girl. Since you've come along, I've worn more skirts, dresses and heels than ever before in my life. It seems like nearly half my closet is now pink and purple, rather than the old blue and black. You've forced me to control my mouth, so that those inner lies about my true beauty and worth don't escape my lips to find your precious little ears. Your mere presence and the thought that my words and behaviors will shape the woman you will become have motivated me to improve myself. I'm so much more aware of the things that go in and on my body now that you've joined our family. I pray that I'm a good example to you of a healthy, strong, intelligent woman.

I love the way you encourage me to fully embrace womanhood. I look forward to Saturday afternoons when you grab the nail polish and sweetly ask, "Is it time to paint ours nails?" Then you make me choose the color, to ensure that our nails will match. Princess, I love our girl time.

For years I thought I could be content being a mom to only boys. You rocked our world in such a dramatic way; leading to new jobs, new city and a new home. It's so difficult to imagine what our life would be if not for you. I'm sure I would have been content without you, Princess, but I wouldn't be the woman I am today without you to inspire me. I'm truly glad you were born and I love being your mom.

Love, Mom (Heather)

We love using Piggy Paint for our girly manicure sessions, so we wanted to make sure it was included in our Mother's Day sale. Save $1 on all your favorite varieties of Piggy Paint Polish, Refined collection, Project Earth collection and remover.

Be sure to share with us your own "I'm glad you were born" story for your chance to win Cotton Babies gift cards worth up to $100. For details and to enter, visit this blog post.

Mother's Day 2011: I'm glad you were born

Last year, we introduced “I'm So Glad You Were Born” as a special mother's day promotion. We were overwhelmed with the responses and really moved by your amazing stories. We loved the results so much, we just had to host this contest again. But this time, we're just going to make sure we have a big box of tissues ready for the judging session.

For those who are new to Cotton Babies or may have missed last year's contest, here the original blog post and inspiration for the contest:

Have you ever told your kids how happy you are that they were born? I was looking at my children wrestling on the couch the other day and had a melty mommy moment. Andrew has such a gentle heart. Oscar loves to laugh. Elsie is fourteen months old now and turning into a little dancing (and couch wrestling!) diva. She was such a pleasant surprise. I didn't know how much I could love another little person. Now I know. I tell my kids almost every night that God put them in my belly and that He decided that I was supposed to be their mommy. I am so glad they were born.

It's Mother's Day this weekend. As I was pondering how to have a Mother's Day promotion at Cotton Babies, I realized that I feel most rewarded as a mother when I'm talking to my kids about how much I love them. Flowers are great. Lunch is great. New clothes are great. A hug is fun... but truthfully, my heart gets the biggest thrill from that knowing nod my four-year-old has when he hears that I'm glad he was born... now that's a Mother's Day present. So, in honor of Mother's Day, I want you to write a comment on this blog post about someone little in your life (biological, adopted, foster, god-child, in-utero, in-mind or even some other status I didn't think of) and why you are glad they were born - or are going to be born. One person is going to win $100 Gift Certificate to Cotton Babies!

How to Enter:
Write one comment on this post about a child in your life using the theme "I'm So Glad You Were Born". One comment (one entry) per person. Comments should be limited to 250 words. Contest entries only please. Inappropriate or irrelevant comments will be deleted. If you have a comment about an entry, want to support a particular entry or have something else to say, feel free to leave a post on the Cotton Babies Facebook page.

Entries must be received by Sunday, May 15th (note: contest extended due to Blogger outage). A winner will be announced by Friday, May 20st. It may be sooner, but we're anticipating quite a few entries to sort through. We want enough time available to give each entry a fair review. Please be sure your e-mail address is visible to our Cotton Babies staff, winners will be notified via e-mail only.

Judging:
First, second and third place winners will be selected based on content. We are looking first at the content and quality of what you wrote. Please check your spelling and your grammar. If we have trouble deciding between two entries, we will also consider how many of the optional things (see "Extra Credit Opportunities") you did to promote the contest and your favorite baby retailer, Cotton Babies. Additional runners up will be drawn at random. For every 100 entries, 3 random winners will be drawn (i.e. 200 entries = 6 random winners; 500 entries = 15 random winners).

Extra Credit Opportunities:

• Tweet about the contest by using the #cottonbabies hashtag and linking to this post.
• Subscribe to this blog.
• Blog and encourage others to enter this contest and to shop at Cotton Babies.
• "Like" this post (below) to share it with your Facebook friends.
• Join our mailing list to receive notifications about coupons, sales and second quality merchandise exclusively available through the Cotton Babies "In The Loop" newsletter:
  
  

  Join Our Mailing List

  Email:

  
  or use this link to subscribe to the newsletter: http://bit.ly/bfl7VT
• Add a link recommending Cotton Babies to your blog using this text and image:

<a href="http://clothdiapers.blogspot.com"><img src="http://www.cottonbabies.com/images/mothersday2011/GladUWB_button180x180.gif"></a>
Please provide relevant links to your tweet, blog, social media page and forum post in your comment if you chose to complete these steps. Remember, this isn't required... and please don't harrass your friends on Facebook or Twitter to get "extra" entries. Once is good enough!

Winnings:

• 1 grand prize winner ($100 gift certificate to Cotton Babies)
• 1 second place winner ($50 gift certificate to Cotton Babies)
• 1 third place winner ($25 gift certificate to Cotton Babies)
• 3 additional runners up per 100 contest entries ($10 gift certificate to Cotton Babies)

Gift certificates will be e-mailed to the winners and can only be redeemed online through the Cotton Babies website. You must either live in the United States or have a shipping address in the United States to be eligible to win. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary to win.

Final Thoughts:
Please keep what you write and share it with your child when they are old enough to understand it. I'd love to know how you decided to do this when the time comes!

By the way, thank you for shopping with Cotton Babies and for using our brands (bumGenius, Flip, Econobum & Hemp Babies). Have a great weekend everyone!

Real Mom Talk: Feelin' fine in just a few minutes time

A while back, we asked for "Real Mom Talk" topics and one mom suggested 'how to look your best when you haven't showered in days.' When I read it aloud to the Cotton Babies offices, a mom immediately answered "Flat Iron!"

While a little tongue-in-cheek, it's a great topic to discuss. It's hard to feel your best when you are sleep deprived and your body is recovering from pregnancy and delivery. Add breastfeeding into the mix and it's easy to feel as if your body is not your own. It's taken some time, but with boldness, I learned to ask moms of multiple children their tips on how to feel "put together" and pretty when you feel flabby and frumpy. Some of these tips can even be used for those final weeks of pregnancy.

My favorite personal discovery was jewelry. Something about wearing a complimentary set with a necklace and earrings made me feel so much prettier and intentional when I left home, even if I was still wearing jeans, a t-shirt and flip flops. I'd pick up pieces in dollar stores, thrift stores and on clearance until I had a rainbow of choices to go with any outfit.

I asked some of the most beautiful women I know to share their tips on how they look and feel their best:

Bekah said, "Belly binding for the newborn days." Cotton Babies has a variety of items including the Belly Bandit to help get your body back in shape after baby. You can see them all in our postpartum section.

"A little lipgloss, blush and mascara go a long way to help you look and feel put together (even if you weren't able to shower that day)," responded Shannon and Jamie agreed.

Libby says, "SMILE!" If you are looking for a reason to smile, she suggests this blog post: Smile.

Heather said, "When I find an everyday a shirt I like, I'll buy it in every color they have that is flattering to my skin tone. I have one go-to pair of sporty flats that can dress up or down. In short: keep it simple. Don't put too much emphasis on how you look unless it effects how you feel."

Feeling confident and put together can mean different things to different people. What do you do to feel your best and put your best foot forward when life leaves you feeling flustered and frazzled? Share your tips, let's learn from each other.

Real Mom Talk: International Women's Day

Today, March 8, 2011 is the 100th anniversary of International Women's Day. You can read more about the history of International Women's Day, the theme and events at the official website. The theme for 2011 is "Equal access to education, training and science and technology: Pathway to decent work for women".

If you hadn't already noticed, the natural parenting and cloth diapering communities are filled with amazing women that work hard to improve the lives of their own family, as well as families around them. These women invent products to fill a need and then ensure the products are created in a environmentally friendly and ethical way. What is interesting about many of these entrepeneurs is that if you ask, they often say they were inspired by women around them: their mothers, aunts and friends.

Arianna Huffington, co-founder and editor-in-chief of the Huffington Post, published a beautiful article today about her mother, "the woman who had the greatest impact on my life". Ms. Huffington shares advice and stories from her mother, including a story about when her mother was working with the Red Cross in Greece. It reminded me that, as women, much of our "work" isn't always a traditional, or even paid, job.

Many great women put forth great effort in organizations that improve the lives of others, regardless of whether they are paid staff or volunteers. We, as women, inherently understand that payoff isn't always financial or personal gain. Many of us long to leave the world a better place for future generations. The women who marched, rallied and pushed governments 100 years ago set the foundation for the liberties we have today. Today, there remain many areas, both in the U.S. and internationally, where women need significant change to improve their lives.

To celebrate International Women's Day, please tell us what organizations you support that work to improve lives of women. Share with us why this organization is significant to you. Let's celebrate together how far we've come and how, together, we can impact future generations.

How To: Turkey Dinner for the Holidays

As we were discussing what to post on the blog around Thanksgiving, we started laughing in the office about how many of us have completely failed at trying to have a turkey dinner. Most of us have had at least one spectacular failure... many of the others had just never tried.

My assistant, Rita, has previously offered to share her mother's recipe for a successful Thanksgiving Day with me and I'd foolishly declined... thinking I'd be just fine. Unfortunately, last year's Thanksgiving was a total train wreck. At 4pm (lunch was supposed to be at 2), I was near tears on the living room couch while my husband and father-in-law sorted out the lumpy, gross gravy disaster.

Rita has graciously shared her mother's recipe with everyone. I hope that it helps you prepare a wonderful Thanksgiving Dinner. I'm certainly going to try it!

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Kindest regards,

Jenn

P.S. If you have ideas for how to make Thanksgiving Day go better, please share your ideas in the comments. If you're like me and struggle in the kitchen, feel free to tell us your Thanksgiving Day disaster stories. I'll be watching, reading and hopefully learning something new from every comment!

Turkey Recipe

by Rosalie Bira, courtesy Rita Sciaroni

First defrost your turkey starting two days prior to the Big Day by setting the turkey in your refrigerator. Place the turkey on a dish towel.

The night (or day) before, take it out and remove the gizzard, liver and neck. Place the turkey in cold salt water. (Just pour salt in the water and put the turkey in it.) A good pan to use is your dishpan. This assures you the turkey is thoroughly defrosted and it will be thoroughly clean. While turkey is soaking:

Take the (heart), liver, gizzard and neck; rinse in cold water. Place in saucepan and add boiling water to cover.

Add:
1 tsp. salt
2 whole peppercorns
2 whole cloves
1/2 bay leaf
2 thin slices onions
1 stalk celery - cut up
1 carrot - cut up

Cover and cook over moderately low heat for about 15 minutes. Remove liver. Continue to cook until gizzard is tender - about 2 to 3 hours. Strain and reserve. (Remove some of the meat from the neck and put it back in the broth). You can chop up giblets coarsely and return to broth too. You will use this when you make your gravy. You can also add this to your dressing, especially the cut up meat and giblets.

Then make your dressing. NEVER stuff your turkey the day before with dressing. This promotes bacteria. Put dressing in refrigerator and keep it for the time you are ready to stuff your turkey.

STUFFING FOR 18 LB. BIRD:

This is Grandma Bira's stuffing. We use it because Dad likes it. Maybe in the years to come you'll try something else you like better.

2 or 3 packages Croutons (instructions on package will tell you how much you need for the weight of the turkey you have.
2 eggs
1 1/4 tsp. thyme
2 tsp. sage
2 cups onions
2 cups celery
2 tsp. salt
3 tsp. poultry seasoning
2 beef bouillon cubes
5 cups water
1 cup butter

Put butter in big skillet and melt slowly. Put onions and celery in butter and cook, stirring till celery and onions are transparent not brown.

Put croutons in big bowl. Pour the onion, celery and butter mixture over croutons and mix thoroughly.

In a saucepan, combine the water and bouillon cubes and cook until cubes dissolve. Put in the seasonings and pour this over your bread crumbs. Slightly beat eggs and put this in mixture -- blending thoroughly. At stuffing time you can put the meat from the neck and gizzard in the dressing. Put in refrigerator and cover. DO NOT STUFF TURKEY UNTIL YOU ARE READY TO BAKE IT.

Now your turkey should be clean and thoroughly defrosted and ready to dry it off. Pat it dry with dish towel. Be sure you get the water out of the neck cavity too.

Rub your turkey with some white vinegar, then rub the outside with Crisco (as best as you can - it's a little difficult with the vinegar on it.)

Then figuring 1/8 teaspoon for each pound, rub the cavities with salt.

Place it back in the refrigerator. I usually cover it with a big dish towel and place it on a large meat platter.

Next day, when you get ready to bake it:

Take the turkey and dressing out of the refrigerator and stuff according to your cookbook. It will also have the time table in it for baking your turkey by weight.

However you cookbook might say "don't cover and don't add water." I have (and my mother too) have always added water (1/4 cup) and a big tablespoon Crisco and I cover the turkey with my roaster top.

BASTE OFTEN BASTE OFTEN

After your turkey is done:

Your cookbook will give good hints on this. You should use meat thermometer. (I can usually tell by appearances because the legs pull away and it looks done). Also, it's best to allow the turkey to stand out (after it's done) for about 1/2 hour - this is the time you make the gravy in the same pan that the turkey was baked in.

When ready to make gravy, here is a good gravy recipe I found years ago in my Redbook Magazine.

GIBLET GRAVY

1/2 cup fat from turkey drippings
1/2 cup unsifted all purpose flour
5 cups liquid (including reserved giblet broth)
Salt and pepper to taste
cooked giblets (optional)

After turkey is removed from roasting pan, pour drippings from pan into a bowl (I use a large measuring cup) leave most of the brown particles in the pan. Let the fat rise to the top of the drippings. Skim off 1/2 cup fat and pour into a large skillet. Skim off remaining fat and discard (When I have a very large crowd of people I never throw away the remaining fat just in case I have to make more gravy). Add rest of the drippings to reserve giblet broth, pour into the roasting pan. Place over moderate heat and stir scraping to remove brown particles from the bottom. Measure liquid from roasting pan and add enough water to make 5 cups.

Heat the 1/2 cup turkey fat in the skillet over low heat; gradually blend in flour. Cook until mixture bubbles. Remove skillet from heat and add the 5 cups liquid gradually, stirring constantly.

Cook over moderate heat stirring constantly, until thick and smooth. Add salt and pepper. Add chopped giblets (optional).

Makes 5 cups gravy

Rosalie Bira was mother to three Cotton Babies employees, Rita, Kathy and Jeanne. Cumulatively, these sisters have raised 9 children, 8 grandchildren (with another on the way) and served at Cotton Babies for more than 13 years. We're thankful that Rosalie raised such amazing women and that they shared their secret family recipe with us.

Real Mom Talk: Is motherhood a prison?

The Wall Street Journal just published an opinion piece on attachment parenting & cloth diapers in their Saturday edition. The headline - "Spend every moment with your child? Make your own baby food and use cloth diapers? Erica Jong wonders how motherhood became such a prison for modern women."

The author is clearly talented. Her article was deftly written to stab a knife in the heart of those who have wielded other equally venomous attacks in her direction. She eloquently attacked the parenting style, but I wish she had identified the real issue before writing a sadly misdirected article to be published on a platform like The Wall Street Journal. Her knife doesn't belong in the heart of the parenting style. Her knife belongs squarely between the eyes of the culture and attitude behind the parenting style.

Jong is described as a feminist activist. How did we reach the day that a feminist activist is speaking out against a woman's choices in parenting? Feminism involves political, cultural and sociological theories, as well as philosophies concerned with issues of gender difference. Did I really just read an article written by a feminist that advocated against choices that women should be allowed to make without fear of criticism or rebuff? Is she really attacking the right issue? Or could she just be saying, "Shut up world! I am ME and YOU don't get to decide if I was a good mom"?

Jong's words were just given a pedestal in one of the most well respected newspapers in our country. I think it's time that we, as a community, choose to raise the standard. This article shouldn't have been about a parenting style. The only reason she sees life through those lenses is because someone left her feeling like a bad mom. Someone shaped an influencer. Was it you?

It isn't the first time it's happened either. We saw it last week. And the week before...

The real issue is a lack of cultural civility between mothers. I've watched women rip each other apart online seemingly without consequence for years. Then they come into my store scared to ask questions because they are afraid that their method of parenting won't meet my standard. If I had a $1 for each apologetic look I've had from a woman, I could pay off my house and yours too. It's sad! Women should not be eating each other alive. Imagine how the world would be if we encouraged each other the way we hope to be encouraged. Dare I say it? We would all be better mothers. Most women really don't want anyone telling them what to do... because, as we all know, there aren't any hard and fast rules other than to do the best you can.

Natali Del Conte called for an "internet time out" last week in her blog post after the cloth diapering community viciously attacked her (CBS was kind enough to remove the worst comments). Her report about "Diaper Wars" on CBS certainly wasn't a fair representation of cloth diapers. Frustration was justified. Coordinated education and protest was justified. However, even righteous anger isn't justification for ripping apart someone's mothering skills or criticizing her personal integrity.

Del Conte chose to take the cloth diapering challenge and cloth diaper her baby for one month. I'm proud of Del Conte for standing up to the cloth diapering community and offering to try cloth diapers while also drawing a line in the sand around her parenting choices.

I wish I was as proud of the cloth diapering community for the manner in which the challenge was posed. Yes, we want cloth diapers to be fairly represented in the media... but frankly, if Del Conte actually discusses the character of the cloth diaper community in her followup report on CBS, we're likely to hear something more like what Jong just wrote for the Wall Street Journal.

Our customers tell us that they want cloth diapers to be mainstream. They want to be able to walk into a store in their hometown and pick up whatever they need. If this is ever going to happen, it is important that the cloth diapering community stops using words and attitudes to alienate the very people who can help make that dream a reality.

"When in Rome, do as the Romans do." - St. Ambrose (A.D. 537)

I rarely write posts that so clearly state my opinion, but I've seen enough in the last week to last the rest of my career. I'm calling on all of the industry leaders to stand up and draw a line in the sand. Raise the standard. Stop hosting drama. Stop generating hatred. Stop hating. We should be respectful, friendly advocates for mothers who are learning. Research. Speak carefully. You never know who you are talking to or who is going to read what you have written. It's time to realize that the influencers in our culture are watching you and start behaving like something and someone that should be watched.

When treated professionally and with respect, authors like Erica Jong, reporters like Natali del Conte and even buyers from big box stores could freely advocate for your product and parenting choices... rather than rail against the emotional prison imposed by rude, unfettered tongues.

Real Mom Talk: What Happened to my Body?

As many of you have already commented, one of the biggest changes that no one shares with you during the nine glorious months of pregnancy is how many different parts of your body will never be the same after carrying a child.

My body changed slowly each day for nine months to adjust to carry my child and yet I somehow was disappointed when two days after delivery my body still looked six months pregnant. My stomach was saggy, spongy and deflated and my hips were wider than my shoulders. I expected it all to magically snap back into place like a pair of elastic pants as soon as the baby popped out. When it didn't, I felt like a failure.

Equally difficult to accept was the scar that accompanied my c-section. Thankfully, a dear friend pointed out that ugly scar represented a procedure that saved my life and my child's as well. Without that incision, we might neither have survived.

I don't even want to talk about the changes from nursing four children, it's not pretty. Let's just say I'm thankful to live in a day where push-up bras and shape wear are readily available. I just wish I'd known about the Belly Bandit in the early months after my twins were born!

With my children being born so close together, it took years for me to begin to accept what was the new norm for my body. Honestly, I still struggle with my body image. On the inside, I'm still the energetic, athletic high school girl that wore short skirts, knee high socks and fitted shirts. She's now hidden somewhere behind the mask of my new mom body. Adjectives like hot, cute and sexy have been replaced in my mind with strong, powerful and healthy. They are certainly not my favorite adjectives, but they are better than the negative ones that used to fill my mind.

It's taken a lot of work to reach any sort of contentment with this body, most of it battling in my own mind, some of it through diet and exercise. I sometimes wonder if someone had taken the time to share with me how long it takes your body to fully recover from a pregnancy if it might have made it easier, if it would have helped me form more realistic expectations? Maybe not, I don't think there is a magic solution to keep other women from the same struggles and insecurities that come with the changes that occur during pregnancy.

How do you feel about your body, post pregnancy? What was the most shocking change you experienced? Have you accepted your new mom body? What helped you learn to appreciate it?

Real Mom Talk: Postpartum Depression

This week, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommended that pediatricians screen mothers of newborns for postpartum depression. According to the AAP, “Estimated rates of depression among pregnant and postpartum women can range between 5 percent and 25 percent.”

Cotton Babies currently has more than 10,000 fans on our Facebook page. If we apply these statistics, thousands of you, your sisters, your daughters or your wife could be dealing with issues of depression.

Postpartum depression is a serious issue that needs to be talked about openly. As with many mental health issues, there is often a stigma attached to PPD. Sometimes even well meaning mothers, women and even medical personnel can dismiss symptoms with comments like, “Every new mom feels that way sometimes” or “Of course dear, you're sleep deprived. It's only natural you feel like that.” What are we as a community of moms to do? We need to educate ourselves and others. According to the Mayo Clinic:

Postpartum depression may appear to be the baby blues at first — but the signs and symptoms are more intense and longer lasting, eventually interfering with your ability to care for your baby and handle other daily tasks.

Symptoms may include:

• Loss of appetite
• Insomnia
• Intense irritability and anger
• Overwhelming fatigue
• Loss of interest in sex
• Lack of joy in life
• Feelings of shame, guilt or inadequacy
• Severe mood swing
• Difficulty bonding with the baby
• Withdrawal from family and friends
• Thoughts of harming yourself or the baby

Education alone isn't enough. As women, we need to talk openly about PPD, reassure others that it's nothing they've done wrong and encourage each other to get help if necessary. Have you been diagnosed with postpartum depression? Have you been helped or helped others who have battled PPD? Share your story, help us dispel the myths about PPD.

Real Mom Talk: I'm a good mom

This morning, a stranger told me I was a good mom and it made my day.

Each morning, I wait with my boys for the school bus. Our neighborhood is filled with early morning walkers, most past their parenting years. One of my sons was on the ground investigating something on the sidewalk. A walker approached and I shouted, "MOVE!" The polite walker said, "Oh it's okay." Not wanting to seem an overbearing mom, I replied, "We're trying to teach him awareness of others."

Little did I know that statement would spark a five minute conversation. I discovered my neighbor was a retired 4th grade teacher. In her opinion, awareness of others and basic social skills are just as important as academics. She shared some things she'd encountered in her years in the classroom and reassured me it's never too early to start teaching good manners. Our conversation ended as she said, "You're a good mom. Keep up the good work!" She popped her earbud back in, turned and resumed her power walk.

My neighbor had no idea three days ago, I'd taken my children to the pediatrician with claws for nails and scratch marked arms from a recent brotherly tangle. She couldn't have known my husband found a cup of spoiled milk in my minivan when we swapped cars yesterday. I hope she couldn't see the toys strewn on the floor from our front windows. She had no idea of my recent mom failures.

What she could see was that I was a mom that cared enough for my children to invest in what I believe will make them the best people they can be. My daughter may have wild, uncombed hair in public, but love, manners and concern for others are drilled into my children. That's what is important to our family. That was enough for her to deem me a "good mom".

I feel I have pretty good parenting self-esteem. I work hard not to compare my family too much to other families. I was surprised at how much her simple positive comment reassured and fortified me. It also made me realize I need to be more purposeful in supporting and encouraging other parents as well.

Have you encouraged a good mom or dad lately? Share your story, I need some ideas.

Good Moms

As I watched the comments flowing in on my post about why all moms should be treated with respect, I was overwhelmed by just how many of you have been so deeply impacted by people or companies who questioned your ability to be a good mom - or tied being a good mom to the use of a particular behavior or type of product.

There are hundreds of readers here. So share your stories, mommas.

I'll start... I've had many supportive women in my life over the last seven years of being a mom. One of those women is my mom. She has faithfully provided me with her thoughts about being a parent... but she has also been quiet when I just needed to figure things out on my own. I really love and appreciate my mom.

Tell me about your favorite supportive friend. Tell us about why she (or he) helped you feel like a good mom.

All moms deserve to be treated with respect.

All moms deserve to be treated with respect. I'll say it again, maybe a little louder this time. All moms deserve to be treated with respect.

We all know that there are really bad moms out there. I'm not writing about those moms.

I'm writing about the moms we are all friends with - the ones who really, truly, want to do a good job taking care of their baby. I'm writing about you. You deserve to know that you are a good mom.

Over the last seven years, I've found myself in an interesting position with the parents who shop in my store (Cotton Babies). We opened our store seven years ago as fresh parents with very, dare I say, arrogant opinions about parenting. I'd actually said, and I'm blushing as I type this:

"My child will never be allowed to behave like that child."

"My child will never be that dirty".

"What kind of a mom allows _______?"

"My child will never know what a pacifier is."

"My child will never get a bottle. What kind of mom doesn't breastfeed?"

"Look at the ugly disposable diaper on that baby."

We are seven years into parenting now and, we couldn't have been more wrong. My child has behaved like "that child". My child has been "that dirty". I have been the mom that allowed _____. I begged my babies to take pacifiers. My oldest and my youngest both had bottles at some point during their first year because of issues with breastfeeding, particularly during their first weeks of life. And, gasp, yes, I've occasionally had to use disposable diapers on my babies.

The first day that I realized that I had hurt someone with my words was when a close friend of mine broke down in tears after trying for weeks to breastfeed her baby and finally having to give up because her baby was loosing weight and getting dehydrated. She simply didn't produce enough milk to breastfeed exclusively. I was heartbroken. She was my friend. I knew her. I knew how important breastfeeding was to her. She was doing everything "right". She wasn't a failure as a mom. But the lactivist mentality that I'd adopted was making her feel like a bad mom.

Then one day, a customer was in my store with a fussy, young baby and, assuming that every mom who shops for cloth diapers would also share my passion for breastfeeding, I asked her if she would like a place to sit and nurse her baby. She broke down in tears. She couldn't nurse her baby and my offer of a place to sit and "nurse" her baby was more than she could take right then. By this point, I'd tempered my views somewhat... but her response was formative in how I now train my staff. We now ask moms if they would like a place to sit and FEED their baby.

I learned similar lessons around diapering, food, childcare, working out of the home, home schooling.... you name it, I've had my opinions gently (almost always kindly) thrown back in my face by a friend I'd unintentionally hurt with my judgmental attitude. I'm so glad that we get second chances with our friends and that God has given me an opportunity to learn these lessons with people who loved me enough to give me a chance to grow up a little bit.

Today, those hard-learned lessons are applied to the way we approach product development, customer service or any other issue with our business.

We look first to build bridges with people, not walls over differences.

Allow me to explain....

When we created bumGenius, we wanted to create a diaper that family members who might be resistant to the idea of cloth diapering (like dads or grandparents) would actually use. bumGenius has hook & loop closures - a simple thing, but a familiar thing to a parent who already knows how to use a disposable diaper. bumGenius has stretchy tabs. Again, a simple, familiar feature. bumGenius is one-size, has a great warranty, fantastic customer service and makes economical sense. Sold. bumGenius has become a literal juggernaut in the cloth diapering industry. We have a tough time keeping track of just exactly where it is mentioned online now simply because there are SO MANY online mentions of the brand every single day.

When we created the Flip Diapering System, we wanted to create a flexible diapering system that was a little less expensive than bumGenius while providing options to a parent willing to tolerate a two-piece system. Stay dry, organic & disposable inserts became part of that system to properly address the needs of the different types of families we work with. Some really want the stay-dry fabric. Others strongly prefer organics. And really, most (not all) people use disposable diapers at some point with their baby. The disposable inserts take care of those times in life when you really just need a throwaway option.

When we created the Econobum System, the goal was to take care of families who really can't afford diapers period. Buying bumGenius would be nice - but it really just isn't going to happen because, frankly, they just need to be able to feed their family. I remember all too well the days of having to choose between diapers and groceries. It's a hard place to be and it just didn't seem fair that there wasn't a good, solid, one-size option for that family. Econobum is for you, momma.

Our goal as a company is to make it easy for more people to use cloth diapers. With bumGenius, Flip and Econobum, we've given more parents options, increasing the accessibility to cloth diapers by recognizing families in different places in life. Some people can cloth diaper 100% of the time, but not everyone. Some people can afford organic diapers, but not everyone. Some people can afford cloth diapers, but.... not everyone. People are different. Different people need options.

A few weeks ago, I was interviewed by Mothering Magazine for an article that will publish soon about cloth diapers. The interviewer was curious about why we did a disposable insert for our products. She also wanted suggestions about how to best word her article to avoid offending parents who cannot use cloth diapers for one reason or another. She was also interested in knowing why we have so many users in our diapering systems who are new to cloth diapers (and switching over from disposables).

My answer to her.... and to you.... is that we believe in building bridges, not walls. We believe that every family, every parent, every baby is different. We believe that you (and all your lovely differences) deserve to be treated with respect. Therefore, our products assume nothing about you.... and in the process of providing more families with what they need, we have made the cloth diapering world a bigger, better place for more, different people. I like it that way. I hope you do too.

Happy almost earth day.

~Jenn Labit

Cotton Babies, Owner

Creator of Flip, bumGenius and Econobum

P.S. Hey dads, most of my readers are women, but I know that there are lots of dads out there too... feel free to swap out "dad" for "mom" wherever appropriate. We love you too.