Creating a Yes Environment

We've all heard it. The child yelling "No!" at the top of their lungs. It often seems like that is the first word that children learn to use on a regular basis. I hear it in restaurants, in stores, in church, and at the park. Children love to use that word to separate themselves as individuals.

But it doesn't have to be something you hear day in and day out in your own home, from your own child. By creating a Yes Environment in your home you really can minimize the amount of obstinate No's that you hear.

So what do I mean by a Yes Environment? I mean making your home (because that is the easiest place to start) a place where your child doesn't hear the word No very often. There are two steps to this.

1. You have to make your home a safe, baby and toddler friendly atmosphere. No, you don't have to live in a place that looks like a playpen, but you can minimize the obstacles that make living with your toddler on a day to day basis more work. This is called Baby proofing. How far you have to go with baby proofing depends entirely on your child. Some children seem to never have any interest in what is under the bathroom cabinets and some will be able to scale multiple obstacles, stack boxes into stairs and pick any lock you put in front of them just so they can see what is exactly in the middle of a jumbo roll of toilet paper. I have had a little of each extreme. But those little Search-and-Destroy types are truly exhausting. No matter what baby proofing aids you use you still have to be hyper vigilant about where they are every second. To create your Yes Environment, you want to remove as many reason for saying no as you can, but don't even try to remove all of them. The child does still need to learn that there are just some things that you need to leave alone.

Safety is a important issue and Baby Proofing tools can make it a lot easier to handle. But never trust any gadget or device to keep your child safe from dangerous household chemicals.

Allow your child a few things to "get into" that are not strictly toys. Leave one kitchen cupboard with safe (if a bit messy) kitchen stuff like tupperware and cookie cutters. Hairbrushes are a fun thing for them to explore in the bathroom (and are a good deal more sanitary than the toilet brush!) While you fold laundry allow them to dismantle a nice stack of towels or a basket of socks.

2. Examine the language you use with your child. Save the word No for times that there is no alternative. Redirect your child whenever possible. And when it is not possible to redirect, try other phrases that still mean no.

An example of redirection: You stop by a friend's house for a quick chat and your toddler spots a lovely statue on her coffee table. As you see your toddler heading in that direction with That Gleam in his eye, you get the urge to say No. Instead you say, "Isn't that pretty? Mommy will help you touch it." or "Let's see if we can blow some dust off of this!" (while holding your hands behind your back). Allow a moment or two and then turn the child's attention elsewhere. You have respected your child's interest, but not allowed them to get themselves (or you) into trouble. If you child keeps going back to the statue, you may have to walk them through the process a few more times before either they get tired of it or they need to have the situation altered by either removing them or the item from the room.

Another example: You are at a store and your child sees something they will simply die without. They whine, they plead - in that way only a non-verbal toddler can plead, they just have to have it! "Not this time." is a good one. "I like that too!" "Let's tell daddy about this." or just flat our distraction by showing your child other things or acting silly can work. Or you might just wind up finishing your shopping with a very angry child. "We're not going to get this today." is a simple and direct negative answer that just doesn't include the word No.

There are as many ways to deal with these situations as there are parents. Our goal is to raise our children to be good people who understand that the world will not hand them their every wish on a platter. Sometimes they need a plain old No and sometimes they need a negative answer served up with a healthy helping of compassion.

By watching the words you use and keeping things positive but still firm in their meaning, you can guide your child to a vocabulary that has relatively few No's in it at all.

Now if I could get them to not use the word "MINE!" I would be all set.

Baby Food Comparison

I wish I could give you scratch and sniff internet for this post because the difference would just blow you away! This is a little experiment you may just have to try at home to really get the full effect.

I purchased a jar of baby food peas and a bag of frozen peas. When I got home I microwaved a bowl of the frozen peas and then whirled it in the blender for a moment or two. Then I put the two kinds of peas side by side so you could see the difference.

Oh how I wish you could smell it too! The frozen peas smell so sweet and fresh and the baby food ones... well I can guess why so many kids hate their veggies if this is their experience with them. The jarred peas hardly smell like food at all.

The textures are pretty different as well, as you can clearly see. The jarred food has an almost gritty feel to it and the frozen ones are just what you would expect from some peas. There are still little pea-casings in the frozen peas, and you may find those in your child's diaper later on. But they are certainly nothing to worry about.

This experiment works with other veggies as well; carrots, squash, green beans, potatoes, you name it. Give it a whirl (in the blender) and see what you think!

The new retail store is open!!

We opened on Saturday at 12:30pm. YAY!!

The new address is 9916 Kennerly Plaza. You'll find us next to Walgreens across the street from St. Anthony's Hospital on Tesson Ferry Road.

Directions:
Take I-270 to Tesson Ferry Road.
Turn West.
Look for Walgreens on your Left.
That stoplight is Kennerly.
Turn left on Kennerly.
You'll see Cotton Babies on your left.

We look forward to seeing you soon!

What if my diapers are repelling? Use Dawn...

One wise mom's advice for stripping diapers that are repelling is:

A quick scrub with DAWN (or other grease cutting dish detergent) – it works like a charm!

On a clean, dry diaper, apply a little bit of dawn to the inside, add water, work into a lather by hand (one diaper at a time), rinse and then launder.

Be sure that you are using a reduced amount of detergent as detergents leave residue (the more you use, the more residue you can expect) and the problem will likely return. Avoid scented detergents as these are specifically designed to leave residues. The thought that the more detergent you use the cleaner your diapers will be, is not the case. Also be sure to do a second rinse after the wash cycle to rid as much detergent as possible.

Some “for baby” detergents can also be problematic as plant oils tend not to rinse out as well.

Cotton Babies Retail Store is moving!!

We've been working hard on getting the build-out finished for the new retail store (located at 9916 Kennerly Plaza in St. Louis, MO). The new sign is up and we should have the final permits tomorrow! We packed up the old store today and have temporarily closed at the old location until we can get everything moved in at the new address. I will send an email out to the St. Louis list as soon as I have information about the opening date. As long as everything goes smoothly, it will be very soon.

New Products!

When the new store opens, we'll be debuting many new product lines (some are new to St. Louis) so you'll want to be sure to visit our new location for the scoop. You're going to find new strollers, new carseats, new clothes and lots of fun new products from brands you know and a few you don't!

We're giving away a carseat!

The coming months will be full of events designed to support local parents. Our first event is scheduled for May 3rd when Britax will be sending a trained carseat technician to the store on May 3rd to do car seat demonstrations. At 1pm, we'll be doing a group demonstration in our teaching area. After the demonstration at 1pm, we'll give away a Britax Boulevard to someone who was there for the entire demonstration.

Food Fun: A Photo Essay

Zucchini is getting cheap around here, summer must be right around the corner! I bought a bunch the other day and made some very yummy zucchini bread. I had some extra zucchini when I was done mixing so I figured I would just pop it into my Fresh Baby Tray and make good use of it.


When I have been making veggies for the family it has been easy to pop a little of the leftovers into the blender and put them in the tray as well. I have just made sure to cook the vegetables without butter or salt, but those can always be added at the table if you miss them. For my zucchini, I just packed the shredded zucchini down in the tray without any other preparation. By doing this a little at a time, I have not really spent any extra time on freezing baby food. Well, I have to rinse out the blender, but that is only like a minute.

Once they are good and frozen I just pop them out and put them into labeled bags and rinse the tray out so my tray is always ready to catch more leftovers. I use one tray for food and one for breastmilk.

To get the zucchini baby-ready I popped it into a little bowl and microwaved it for 30 seconds, then mashed it a little with a fork.


Then the real fun began! Lily was not too fond of the zucchini, or maybe the texture. But they say that a baby may need to try something up to 15 times before they like it. Since it is such a mild vegetable, I think we will keep trying. This has been her general reaction to most foods, so I am really not too surprised that she was reticent.


In order to give her a chance to really understand what she was getting, I spooned some of it directly into her hand so she could squish it and smell it and put it in her own mouth. Watching babies have new experiences is an amazing privilege of parents and caregivers!


She played with it for a few minutes before it was time for nap. I think we will try it again later on today, maybe it will keep her busy while I try to eat dinner! (Her bib with a pocket kept her nice and clean.)

Other ideas for making your own baby foods:

• Corn, peas, green beans, carrots... pretty much any vegetable that you would eat yourself. We gave Lily a broccoli stalk to chew on while we ate dinner the other day and it kept her busy. She got enough of it to produce evidence in her diaper, even if it didn't look like she ingested any!
• chopped up fruit
• chicken or beef, VERY finely chopped
• cooked beans, whether canned or cooked from died
• leftover breakfast oatmeal

Some combo ideas:

• Beans and rice: I combine some canned beans with a little leftover rice, swirl in the blender (it gets blended less and less as baby grows and gets more teeth) and pop into your freezer trays.
• Chicken and noodles
• sweet potatoes and chicken (this one is a big favorite with my kids!)
• Apples and additive free breakfast sausage

Really the list is endless! Think about what you feed your family already. Start your baby on individual parts of that, about one every 4-5 days. They don't have to have a lot of it for you to be able to tell if it disagrees with them. A lick, a chew, a spit, and their body has been exposed to the new substance. Before you know it they have sampled most of what you are eating yourself. Don't be opposed to letting them experience the food with all their senses and their hair. The whole world is new to them!

Smells like... Nothin'

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to get your diapers really clean.

Ah, but what does this really mean? It means having nothing left on the diaper but the fabric itself. This is the reason that you want a detergent without brighteners, scents, dyes or fabric softeners. All of these things are meant to leave a little trace on your fabrics. It's all well and good to have some optical brighteners and scents cling to your t-shirt. But when it clings to the fabric of a cloth diaper and then you add in urine on top of that, there are going to be problems. You should be able to stick your face right into a clean diaper from the dryer or line and smell nothing. If you still smell something, you need to rinse some more.

Cleaning your cloth diapers means that you need to get all traces of pee, poop, sweat, dirt, and detergent out of the fabric before you are done. If any of that stuff is left on the diaper you will find yourself with smell problems and possibly rash problems as well. bumGenius Odor Remover is a new way to help break down the stinkies before you even wash.

Since everyone has different skin, water, and washing machines, no one recommendation is perfect for all. It may take a little trial and error to figure out the right detergent and number of rinses for your hardness of water, sensitivity of skin, washing machine, and kind of diaper before you find the right combination for your family. You may still need to use a little bleach every now and then to help strip out the stubborn stuff but you certainly won't need it with every wash. There are also other ways to strip your diapers (remove detergent or rash cream build up) like Dawn dish soap.

Taking a clean load of diapers out of the dryer is one of the small joys in life for me. But maybe I am just really weird.

For more detailed information see Cloth Diapering - Just the Basics.

Trick for Neutralizing Ammonia Odor

I recently read one Moms advice on killing the ammonia odor in her cloth diapers. She says that Lime juice naturally kills bacteria and neutralizes ph, so she puts a tablespoon of it in the final rinse when she washes her cloth diapers.

Give this tip a try and respond letting me know if it works for you!

Me and My Lamby

Lambies are the best. For my last four kids I have used one and it has been so handy. That fuzzy little rug can do just about anything.

We have had our lamby for over ten years now and it still looks pristine. It has been through 4 kids - well it is on its fourth kid and there is not a stain to be found on it. It is still lofty and cuddly and perfect as ever.

Some uses for your Lamby Lambskin:

• Before baby is born, sleep on it yourself. It is wonderfully cushy on those sore hips and it will absorb some of your scent, which makes it comforting for baby after birth.
• Lay baby on top of it. It keeps baby warm when it is cold and cool when it is warm.
  
• Use it as extra cushioning in the stroller.
• Place baby on the Lamby when she needs a little bare bottom time. It will help to keep her warm and will protect surfaces under it.
• Watch baby discover the texture of the wool, they love to run their fingers over the slightly bumpy surface and try to grab the tufts.
• Use it as a home away from home while traveling. The familiar scent and feel will help baby to sleep better in an unfamiliar situation.

Just this afternoon, Lily was rolling around on hers and pulling up the edges and rubbing her own cheeks with them. She would giggle and snuggle it each time and then do it all again. It was truly a precious baby moment.

Care of the lambskin is much easier than I anticipated and is much the same as caring for wool diaper covers. Because wool is naturally dirt resistant, I only wash it right before a new baby and if it gets actually soiled with spit up or other body fluids. And with spit up, it can be wiped off pretty easily, so it doesn't get washed until it has been doused more than a few times. Follow the directions on the wool wash you choose (Not Woolite!) to soak it then hang to dry. Eucalan or LANA 20% lanolin soap both work well.

The Babysitter and the bumGeinius

Dental work. I hate dental work. But what must be done, must be done. So I dropped off the two under-school-aged little people with a good friend of mine so that I could go and be tortured in peace.

My friend has a bunch of her own children, including two close in age to my youngest two. Mine are 6 months and 3 years and hers are 1 year and 3 years. So I knew the kids would have a pretty good time.

She has never been one to understand my love for cloth diapering. It's just not her thing, and that is fine. To keep things easy for her I put Lily in a bumGenius and included both the bumGenius and a disposable diaper for any needed changes. I showed her my wet bag for the soiled diaper and told her she could just use a disposable diaper if Lily needed a change.

Imagine my surprise when I came back and she exclaimed, "That cloth diaper was just as easy as a disposable! I never imagined it could be that easy!" and then followed up with several more questions about cost and care of the diapers.

I'll convert her yet!